


more or less dead

by montivagant



Series: we should run away, oh someday [8]
Category: Batman (Comics), Iron Man (Comics), Under the Red Hood
Genre: Dead Robins, M/M, That's a tag now, impromptu sleepovers, there's a lotta italics in this one and y'know what? i'm valid, to like two members of the batfam at least, tony stark is Secret Identity Man
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-11
Updated: 2019-05-11
Packaged: 2020-02-29 22:09:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18787213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/montivagant/pseuds/montivagant
Summary: Sometimes you try to work in a surprise sleepover and all you get is Star Trek and a shitty couch. Oh, and a mystery. Good thing you're a detective.





	more or less dead

**Author's Note:**

> i'm breaking away from hozier again i feel so guilty sorry guys. the title's from delicate, petite & other things i'll never be by against me!
> 
> this one was rlly fun to write i love steph a lot!!!

It's not even two hours when Tony hears someone at the window. He straightens up, double checking the first aid kit's in easy reach in the process.

He keeps his eyes on the tv at first, but the thumps sound wrong. And there's no cursing. Tony frowns, looks over at window.

It's not Jason, obviously, but Tony's got no idea who it is. He's not sure whether he'd prefer it to be a bat or not.

"Who the fuck are you supposed to be?"

"I'm!--" They snap fast, but also stop fast. "Why are _you_ asking _me?_ I should be asking who you are!"

"Okay, well, I'm here and I asked first." Tony frowns. "You a bat?" His hand digging into the back cushion, he knows there's a knife there.

"Well, I dunno how much you know about," they flounder, wave hands around, "the person who lives here, but I'm not sure which is the safe answer. Y'know, this week."

Ah. He stops looking for the knife. "So that's a yes. Why are you here?"

"Weeeeeeeell, so T--Red Robin mentioned there was a stranger at Hood's place when he dropped by," they're very.. animated. " _And_ that he couldn't figure out who it was, so I had to come congratulate you on stumping him."

Tony can _hear_ the grin behind that mask.

"Oh! And see if I could figure it out! You out, I mean."

He can't help it, he laughs. "In Red's defense, it was pretty dark in here when he dropped by."

"That's never stopped him before! Anyway, I should introduce myself!" They move to the couch, forgetting to close the window behind, "Hi! I'm Spoiler! I _used_ to be Robin!"

"Well, hello Spoiler-used-to-be-Robin, I'm--" Tony squints. "No, that'd be cheating. Nice to meet you. That all you dropped in for?"

They deflate, slightly. "Wellllll...."

"That quiet out tonight?" Tony can't stop a grin. Oh, wait. "Still, probably shouldn't stick around too long, Hood'll get back eventually y'know."

"Yeah! Exactly! I gotta give him something."

Tony sighs, shrugs. "Make yourself at home, I guess. I'm watching Star Trek."

She's asleep on the couch within thirty minutes.

 

Jason slips in much quieter this time, shutting the window behind him and taking off the mask while he wanders to the couch.

"Hey babe," soft, and the kiss is too, leaving a smile on Tony's face.

"Quiet night?" Tony reaches out for a hand, brushing his thumb across the back of Jason's hand.

Jason kisses him again, just as soft, "mhm."

Oh, and Tony could--oh. Right. He stands up, getting himself out of Jason's way to see the kid. "Little bat came by earlier. Said she had something for you? Passed out after two episodes."

Jason's posture changes within a blink, he's still holding Tony's hand but it's changed from gentle to ready to drag the man a mile away if he needs to.

"Don't think she's gonna wake up anytime soon, she lasted through quite a few tv screams. She seemed _exhausted_ , Jay."

He sighs. "Fine. You're such a softie. I'll tell O, you go grab her an extra blanket."

"Mm, sounds like a plan," Tony doesn't let go until he's successfully captured one more kiss. Then he moves off to get the blanket and let Jason deal with the cryptic family stuff. He can vaguely hear Jason, and he's not gonna say he doesn't take the opportunity to try and listen in.

"Oracle? It's Hood. Brown's passed out on my couch," a pause, "safe, no injuries. She looked exhausted. I'm not gonna wake her up, she's welcome to ruin her back on my shitty couch." Another pause. "Mhm. Nope, no injuries either. Quiet night. Mm, will do. Thanks, O."

Interesting. Tony wanders in, dropping the blanket over her. "Should the mask come off? She can breathe through it right? She's not gonna, I dunno, die?"

Jason shakes his head. "She's fine. C'mon, you owe me for waiting till I got back to drop this on me."

He laughs, "whatever you say, Jay."

 

It's morning, but there's only so many windows in this apartment and Jason and Tony have them all on lockdown.

So the kid is still asleep.

Jason keeps glancing at her during their elaborate, carefully quiet, dance around each other in the kitchen.

"What's up?" Tony finally asks, fiddling with a fork as he determinedly stares at the toaster (he will _not_ let the ding go off, he will _not_ let the ding go off.)

Jason's grateful for that, and he lets it bleed into some of his body language when he brushes past Tony. "It's--she's--" a pause, "there's this," another pause, frustrated now, "she just--feels--" he harrumphs, hand flying through his hair, only making it poofier.

Tony won't complain about the hair. But, "that's cool; you don't have to tell me. You don't have to know how to tell it either." He reaches a hand across to land on Jason's shoulder, squeeze it.

The ding goes off.

Tony jumps, curses, curses some more when he tries to grab the bread out of the toaster. He finally gets it done, but he's cursing at himself in his head for being so loud.

The two of them startle and turn to the couch, just in time for the kid let out some unintelligible noise.

She visibly brightens up when she sees Jason--in _pajamas_ even--"Hey!"

Jason snorts.

"And.." a long, considering pause, " _guest._ " She pulls herself into more of a sitting up position, "ooh, do I smell coffee? C'mon, hand it over," grabby hands shoot out over the back of the couch.

Tony stares for a second, suddenly grinning, then starts laughing. "I get it now! Y'know I never really did before but I _get it_ now--you're all like this." He's delighted to have finally figured it out. "Y'know at first I figured it was just him, but no there's like 20 of you kids just hanging around! And you're _all_ like him!" He's still laughing.

Jason sighs, "you're gonna have to come get the coffee yourself, kid. Mugs are there," he points his shoulder to a vague right.

She groans, clearly exaggerated, but drags herself up to zombie-walk to the right cabinet.

Tony feels himself tense at that, but Jason seems, if anything, entertained by it. Tony hums, and turns back around to focus on organizing the eggs on his toast just right.

"Steph." She says to his back.

"Hm?" Muffled by toast, busy slipping into his seat at the table.

"Name's Steph. Stephanie, but."

"..why are you telling me?"

"Well, Red Robin dropped by like a week ago, so if you're _still_ here, then clearly you're not just some guy Mr. Grumpy Pants over here picked up."

Jason mutters something under his breath about detectives, then, at a normal volume, "I don't just _pick up_ random guys."

Steph grins, wide. " _Thus_ proving my point."

He sighs and rolls his eyes.

Tony stifles his laughter as best he can. "Any time you have to leave by?" He doesn't hate the company, but, he knows the tone of voice they'll say his name in when they figure it out. He's not looking forward to that.

"It's Sunday, so," carefree shrug, "nope."

Jason blinks. Blinks again. Frowns. "..I thought it was Monday?" He ventures more than speaks.

Her eyes go comically wide and she fumbles at the puches around her waist, eventually pulling out a sturdy looking phone. She presses a couple buttons until it lights up, then sighs out. Huffs. "You can't _do_ that to me. I was right, it's Sunday."

"Oh." Jason shrugs.

Stephanie groans loudly, then supports her head in her hands. "I want pancakes."

"No."

"As an _apology_ , for almost giving me a _heart attack!_ "

Jason winces this time, glances at Tony.

Tony shrugs.

Stephanie looks between the two of them; "you've had a _heart attack??_ How old _are_ you?"

Tony sighs. "Don't go playing with bombs or sticking forks in electrical sockets."

Bombs? Is he a cape? Steph frowns, staring more at the mystery guest. "I swear... there's something about you.."

"I second the statement about bombs, by the way," Jason, ever so helpfully, adds.

Both Tony and Steph roll their eyes. They notice the other does as well, and laugh.

"Oh, this was a _mistake_ ," Jason's looking between the two. "Okay, bye Brown! Finish your coffee, get out."

She pouts, but she's finishing the coffee. "You want me to just go out in the day like this? What would Batman _think?_ "

"You and I both know you don't care, don't even try."

Steph grumbles into her mug, but she's still getting up to drop it in the sink.

 

"So, you two get along pretty well."

Tony's been fiddling for long enough that Jason startles when he speaks, hand in Tony's hair pausing.

"Yeah. She also died. For.. a lot shorter than me, but it still happened. She.." a pause.

"Remember, you don't have to spill anything you don't want to," Tony's voice is soft.

Jason hums, softly. "She reminds me of myself." His hand starts moving through Tony's hair again. "She's a good kid."

"Good." Tony puts down a tool, leans back against the couch. "Most of 'em are."

"Most?"

"Mm, there was that kid that showed up. Wore red and black. That time you got stabbed in the arm."

" _Red Robin?_ What the hell was he doing here?"

"Said Nightwing sent him to make sure you didn't bleed out in your living room."

Jason grumbles. "How'd you make him leave?"

"Told him I had bat repellent."

Snort. "What'd you have?"

"A knife."

Jason laughs.


End file.
